Welcome to New England, Cam

The last few days of rain and thunder are god’s way of punishing New England because it’s football team somehow landed ass backwards in bed with a former MVP to replace Tom Brady.

Number 12’s departure alone was interesting enough that I’d decided to get back into football this year. I was beyond excited to see how Bill Belichick and Josh McDaniels were going to make the league look stupid without a star passer. But this…this is going to be even more fun.

Newton signed a one-year, incentive-laden deal that maxes out at $7 million. It’s a chance to prove to the league he can still play at a high level. This guy’s going to work his ass off to stick it to all the dumbass teams that passed on him.

Belichick and McDaniels, meanwhile, have a chance to not only prove they can win without Tom Brady but perhaps that they won in spite of the increasingly immobile, noodle-armed, cult-brained QB. These guys are going to work their asses off to stick it to all the dumbasses who questioned their talent because of Brady’s presence.

Nothing has ever motivated the New England Patriots quite like spite. Combine that with easily the most physically gifted passer they’ve ever had…look out, league. The evil empire’s back.

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